Examples of microscopic images that I've taken so far. As well as using my handheld Pocket microscope, I've also invested in another pocket microscope which uses slides. This means I don't have to hold the microscope while taking photographs, and it's zoom is x40 compared to x30 for the handheld. Both will be useful in different situations so it's good to have options! I'll be continuing to take these photographs, exploring different materials underneath the microscope.

Today, while thinking about what to draw, an idea crossed my mind to try and get an imprint from the graphite drawings I created last year. I placed a piece of paper over the area of interest and used a roller to try and get an imprint from the graphite. While the resulting transfers are very faint, I know that I could use this process with 'fresher' graphite drawings to gain a more visible transfer, as more graphite dust will be on the surface. I'm not entirely sure what I'll do with these transfers, but I like their faint, light qualities.

It's a shame that I've lost the confidence in my art that I worked hard for in the first year, but now I feel I have a way of getting it back. I can't help but feel that the first semester was wasted in some way, but I know this isn't entirely true as some ideas have come from it, and the work can't have been bad considering that I managed to maintain a First despite it not being my best work.

Now I know how to move forward, I'm going to start generating lots of drawings, based on the ones I've already created. While I worry they may all end up looking the same, I'm going to try it. I'm also going to consider how I can create the drawings discussed in the feedback session and tutorial - the large, circular drawings, with the drawing continuing beyond the frame. Imagining it, I can't see how it will work well, or after doing a quick test sketch, but I think it's just finding the right drawing subject/style to suit.

I'll consider this my first 'curatorial' problem to solve. The next will be how I choose to display the drawings.

29/01/14 Sign Up Tutorial, Stephen Boyd

Notes:
reproduction of fungi - spores, airborne, rely on air flow/chance

wood carving prints - forgetting the broadness of art and science, accepting that they are artifice, an enhancement of nature

Helen Chadwick - dread of the inside (body) uncanny, trauma of seeing inside and outside together.

Scope, circular frame of drawing, anything beyond the frame is imaginative, more intuitive

Mark Francis - Large abstract paintings, microscopic views, photoblur etc.
Not chosen to look at science/art, aware that people pick this up in his work, implications of science in his work without trying to illustrate it

Detune science from my work process, create more artwork first without trying to illustrate 'science'/'nature', later on re-frame generated work with the implications of science. Need to use a light touch of science in work, not heavily suggest it

Create video's of drawings, can look at them with fresh eyes through the video - possibly create drawings from these video's?



While talking to Stephen about my work since the first year, I found that I couldn't articulate my ideas or thoughts about my work very well at all. Maybe this is an indication of a lack of engagement or interest in what I was working on? Stephen suggested that it may be because I'm not entirely sold on the ideas that I'm attempting to create work from.

I told him about several of the ideas discussed with Liz in the feedback tutorial, such as the prints, and showed him the prints I created from the carved wooden plank. He gave me a 'micro-critique' on the prints, telling me that they are an enhancement of nature, I've enhanced the wood by carving out the growth pattern - less to do with real nature and more artifice. and they are more decorative. They didn't really comment on nature in the way I wanted to. I understood what he meant after he explained this to me.

Trying to discuss what ideas I was working on, he quickly pointed out to me that 'science', 'art', and 'nature' are extremely broad terms, and encompass so many different things that it's impossible for me to be able to work under such a large umbrella of information. He suggested that I narrow down the ideas I have into something much more manageable. I completely agreed with him with this point, as I felt that last semester I often felt overwhelmed by these terms, and it may have stopped me from being as creative as I could have been because I was so focused on the idea of having 'science' and 'nature' present in my work.

Trying to discuss where I would go next, it became apparent that I was struggling, like I mentioned in a previous post. Stephen said that he sensed a lot of anxiety in my voice as I spoke about my work, and said that it seemed so different to my first year. He said that I seemed to have lost a lot of confidence in my abilities, which I agree with, although again I'm not sure why this has happened. He also said that I've tied myself into a knot last semester, and that I need to loosen up again with my work and go back to doing the things I was doing in my first year (in terms of working practice) that I was good at. He added that I have a very good, intuitive ability for drawing, and that I should go back to this. He said that forenow, it would be a good idea for me to completely forget about trying to illustrate or even consider 'science' or nature' in my work, and just concentrate on generating work again - with what Liz said in my feedback about referring back to my drawings to create more work from. Much later on, he said I could reframe the drawings to give viewers the implications of science/nature in my work, without trying to illustrate them wholly and letting that restrain my work - like mark Francis. The realisation that I had been approaching the subject the opposite way really lifted the burden off my shoulders.

Since receiving my feedback and thinking about what was said, I'm still struggling to think of where to go next with my work. I dislike feeling so uncertain about my work, and I'm not entirely sure where this confusion has come from. Since finishing the first year and generating last semesters work, I seem to have lost confidence in my work or my abilities, or myself, I'm not too sure. I'm not sure why it's happened, either.

I have a few general ideas of how I might progress, so I've signed up for a tutorial with Stephen Boyd to discuss them and the trouble I've been having this past week.

What is my work about?

• Things not being confined to the space/frame it's in, growing out, taking over floor/walls
• Becoming something else
• Relationship with nature, nature can't be confined, sometimes it's grotesque

• Creating a response from the audience - Not able to view work passively, have to consider how to move around the work to view it, feel self conscious, emotions from the work

Feedback Tutorial 21/01/14

Feeling apprehensive about the feedback tutorial over Christmas, it was a relief to  finally be able to hear how I could improve in my work, and of course the grade. I was very happy to see that I managed to maintain a First, as while I was happy with most of the work I created I felt that I hadn't developed it enough or created enough. I always feel that I haven't created enough work though, but I guess that is a good position to be in.

One of the main issues I felt that arose from the feedback is that I need to articulate the issues I want to address as an artist, what I want to say and comment on in my work. Who am I as an artist? This is extremely difficult for me, as it has been something I have never been quite sure of, so I really need to sit and think about this properly. Despite this, Liz told me I had lots of ideas generating and many directions I could develop my work, which is good to hear as I feared I had no real, or 'set' ideas. She strongly recommended I choose one idea or path in my work and push it for the next few weeks, as it may help with defining my myself as an artist in addition to pushing one area in my work to the limit. I think this will be beneficial as if it doesn't work, I have only spent a few weeks on it, so I can go back and choose a better idea to run with.

Another suggestion is to start considering the scale of things, and how I can present them. While I had a trial set-up in the gallery space last year, I feel that I didn't gain anything from it and wasn't entirely sure how to approach or properly curate the ideas I had in my mind, and I wasn't successful in articulating them int the gallery setting. Liz also told me to consider setting myself 'curatorial problems' for me to solve. For example, if I were to create a floor based work, how would I go about it? How would I create a work for a certain space? This I feel is a good idea to consider, although probably at a later date when I've generated some new work.

I found that when I felt stuck, I would return to the collection of natural specimens I had collected and draw or work from them. Liz has said that instead of doing this, refer back to the drawings I have already created. By doing this, I could start to develop the work beyond what it's representing. It was also noted that I've been tentative in my approach to the work I've created over the last semester, which I have to agree with. I'm not entirely sure why this has happened, as I felt rather daring and took more risks in my first year and that seems to have disappeared.

I'm going to create a list of possible ideas that I could pursue, and with each ask myself:
Why would I follow this idea? How? What would I be saying by doing this?